The other day, there were a couple of bona fide wackos that came into the store.
First, there was Creepy Carl. He gets his name due to the fact that about a year ago, he was banished from our store for stalking a coworker. He would come in several times a day, ask if she was in, and ask her to demo our espresso machines for him.
Anyway, he has been coming by semi-frequently of late (I figure it’s ok because the girl he was stalking doesn’t work at our store anymore; it also took me a few days to remember where I recognised him from). He comes in the mornings and buys a fruit cup and a yogurt, and asks us to blend it for him with some ice and soy milk.
All this to say, on Tuesday we were out of fruit cups. Creepy Carl picked up an Italian chop salad (lettuce, balsamic vinaigrette, chicken, salami, red peppers, garbanzo beans), and said “You can just blend this” [with his yogurt and soymilk]. I truly think he would have, but my coworker talked him out of it on the grounds that the vinaigrette would make a weird consistency. She convinced him to try juice.
Man, I would love to see a chop salad Frappuccino®.
Later the same day, this guy called the store (twice). He first asked weird questions about a Seattle’s Best Coffee in the area (that never existed), then he wanted to know if we had electrical outlets so that people can “plug in their computers and printers.” I told him that we did allow people to use our power who bring in their laptops for Wi-Fi access.
So he came in. It took him two or three trips from his car to lug in all his equipment. He had a huge suitcase with his laptop, a pretty decent compact(ish) printer still in box. He looked pretty weird with disheveled hair and a gray beard, and his voice had a sort of rasp to it. He asked about the Wi-Fi, and we explained to him that T-Mobile handles the accounts, not Starbucks, so he should open his browser for info and access to T-Mobile’s site, including pricing. I don’t think he understood, because he went on a search of a payphone (there are none near the store), then came back and asked to use our phone to call T-Mobile. I let him; he used it for a couple minutes, returned the phone and started packing up his equipment.
I asked him if he had gotten a hold of T-Mobile. He had, and “It’s expensive. It’s only for rich people.” Then he left, leaving some trash behind for us to clean up.